UP IN FLAMES

Pressure clamped down on her chest and she quickly shook her head. She had been doing so well. Now wasn’t the time to break down. She placed her purse on the desk when someone knocked and the door to her office opened. It was her assistant, Ruby.

“There’s a Mr Harper here to see you, Mrs Spencer. Should I send him in?”

Vanessa’s heart skipped a beat, and she almost ran out the door to see him, but she stopped herself. What use would it be? She’d already left. There was no going back now, so she shook her head, “No,” she replied, “Please tell him I’m not available,”

Ruby left, and Vanessa stood, staring at the door. She knew Alaric well enough to know that if he insisted on coming into her office, no one would be able to stop him. Fifteen minutes later, no one came in and she knew that he’d gone. She should be relieved, but she felt more miserable than ever.

——

Everything should be okay.

Her apartment had been virtually restored. The rental insurance had kicked in and the new furniture had arrived. The fridge was stocked with fresh food, and several shopping bags were in her bedroom, ready to be emptied of her recently purchased items, but Vanessa still felt miserable.

The days blurred together, and Vanessa roamed from one room to the next, vaguely aware of what she was doing. It was going to take a long time for her to forget about Alaric. At the thought of his name, knots formed in her belly. She hadn’t seen him since she left his house, but he would be here any second. He’d called for days after she’d refused to see him at her office, wanting to speak to her, and she’d finally agreed. She wasn’t sure why. She wasn’t ready to talk to him, to have the conversation they needed to. She was convinced that getting into any relationship was a bad idea. Her mother was crazy and Vanessa must bring out the crazy in other people, which probably explained Alaric’s attraction to her.

She laughed at that, but the sound was harsh. Smoothing her hands down her jeans, she went into the living room and sat on the edge of the couch, her spine rigid, and she waited. Thirty minutes later, there was a knock on her door, and her heart jumped out of her chest, landing on the carpet and doing a little jig.

“You can do this,” she whispered, standing. It occurred to her as she went to the door that if she were about to do the right thing, why did she need to convince herself of that?

Alaric caused her breath to hitch in her throat as he stepped inside her apartment. “How are you?” he asked.

She forced a weak smile. “I’m feeling okay. You?”

“Better now.” He reached out, his fingers going for her jaw, but she stepped aside, avoiding his touch. He frowned. “Are you sure you are okay?”

She nodded, then headed into the living room, needing to move from the close space of her entryway. “Um, would you like something to drink?”

The frown on Alaric’s face deepened as he sat on the couch. “No. Come sit with me.”

She hesitated, but the look that appeared on his face told her that if she didn’t, he would be likely to pick her up and drop her ass on it. So she sat…on the farthest cushion. “It was nice of you to stop by,” she said after a stretch of silence. “But as you can see, I’m doing okay.”

His brows rose. “Nice of me to stop by?”This content © Nôv/elDr(a)m/a.Org.

Nodding, she ran her palms over her bent knees and focused on the window. “Can you let me know how much I owe you for your services? I imagine the cost to repair my car was pricey, but like I said, I do have money-”

“Are you fucking serious?” Alaric exploded.

She jumped, her gaze swinging toward him sharply. “I’m not sure I follow that question.”

“You’re not?” Fury darkened his eyes. “I didn’t come here to give you a bill. It’s not like I’m going to charge you.”

Her lips parted. “I have to pay you. I owe you money for the car, for your services-”

“Services?” He spat out the word, a muscle ticking in his jaw. “I helped you because I wanted to, Vanessa. I never once told you that I was going to charge you for any of this.”

She stared at him, her heart thumping heavily. “Why would you do this for free?”

Alaric shook his head as he stood. “You know, this is kind of insulting. Why would I? Is it that hard for you to imagine?”

Apparently so. He cursed under his breath. “I care about you. That’s the reason I helped you. It doesn’t have to do with anything else. And the reason I’m here now is because I care about you.”

Those words formed on the tip of her tongue-those three words-but she couldn’t speak them. All she could think of was her mother saying those words about every man she crossed paths with and those words leaving a trail of destruction in their path. Part of her knew that was stupid, but she couldn’t get past it.

Alaric stared down at her. “You care about me. Hell, I’d wager good money that you’re in love with me.”

She gasped. “That’s not-”

“You’re a shitty liar, Vanessa. You lived with me and even if you never said it, you showed me that you do.”

“I wasn’t…. I didn’t-I don’t… “SShe stammered.

“Bullshit. I’ve told you that before, and I still mean it. After everything that has happened, you can’t admit to what you’re feeling? You’re still willing to hide behind old fears?” he demanded, hitting old wounds with an accuracy that was startling. “You’re not your mother and I’m not some random guy who’s going to change you or break your Vanessa. You’re a goddamn grown woman, Alana, who isn’t afraid to stand up to anyone, but you’re terrified of yourself.”

Anger flashed through her, warring for first place with the unease building. His words…

“You’re a lot of things, Vanessa. You’re beautiful and stubborn as hell. You’re smart and determined. You’re damn good at your job,” he said, holding her stare. “But you’re a coward. And you’d better wake up before the best damn thing walks out of your life and you do end up just like your mother.”