Chapter 178
Strings of Fate
178- Managing and measuring
Bellamy sighs deeply and I can see he looks kind of frustrated. My question must show on my face because when he looks up and makes eye contact he explains.
“You know, I can kind of see why the girl didn’t want to approach me with her problem. I thought that I was doing alright dealing with the Shifter’s personal issues, that they all knew they could come to me. But my first reaction was to dismiss her complaint as childish whining.” He sounds very disheartened.
“I’m now wondering if I’ve been failing all this time. I thought I was managing. Maybe the other Alphas are right and I can’t do this.” He says it like he is second guessing every decision he’s made since taking over as Alpha. His confidence has just taken a serious hit. I hate it. Bellamy is usually a fairly confident person. I frown at him.
“Why is it that every time he second guesses himself it has something to do with me? With something I’ve said. I was trying to help and now it looks like you’re having an existential crisis.” I point out. Bellamy’s eyes widen and he shakes his head quickly.
“No! T
That’s not it at all! L… You… Well, you give me the chance to be honest. As the Alpha, part of my job is to be confident, to not let anyone second guess me. But I don’t have to do that with you. Being able to worry about my decisions and being able to discuss them and come up with alternatives… That’s part of having a mate. It’s meant to be that way. I didn’t mean to make you think it was your fault. It’s… a relief to be able to admit when I’m worried about something.” He explains. Oh, so he was never as completely confident as he made out to be. I’m not making him second guess himself, I’m just giving him the chance to be honest. That actually makes a lot of sense. It definitely makes me feel a lot better.
“In that case, I’m happy to listen. As for you being approachable to the Shifters, you are approachable. They all know that you’ll keep them safe and they all know that you’re doing your best for them. You knew this whole time that you’ve been trying to do the work of two people and you knew that you weren’t totally confident with it. Nothing has changed. If anyone had any real issues with you I’m sure they would have said something by now. Besides… I’m kind of glad you haven’t been able to manage everything perfectly.” I admit. Bellamy tilts his head to the side and raises an
eyebrow.
“Oh? And why would you be glad for that?” He asks. I shrug casually.
“Well… If you could manage all of this alone… You wouldn’t need me.” I point out. Bellamy jumps to his feet and approaches me in my recliner. He kneels by the side of it so that he can look me properly in the eyes.
“You know that isn’t true right?” He asks softly.
“Huh?” I say stupidly. His pretty golden eyes are very distracting. What isn’t true?
“I don’t just need you to help me with being Alpha. You know that right? Even if I wasn’t an Alpha, I would still need you. For me, not for some role I need filled.” He says seriously, staring me in the eyes.
“1–I know that. Well… Maybe I forgot it a bit, Since we met we’ve been helping each other out, with Megan, with Kiara, with the Shifters. I don’t quite know what it would be like, not having some big task to accomplish. But… I’m okay with that. I LIKE that we work together, I LIKE that we think about things differently. I’m hoping that… we can work together like this always, making each other better.” I feel like I’m rambling, but Bellamy seems to understand what I’m trying to say because he seems satisfied with my answer.
1/3
178- Managing and measuring
Abruptly, Bellamy launches to his feet and heads back to his desk.
“Why don’t you go get ready for bed? I have something I want to do quickly, but I’ll be up soon.” Bellamy suggests as he pulls out a notepad and pen and starts scribbling something down. Uh, what? Since when does he tell me to leave? What the hell is he writing? And… is he… blushing? Well, I suppose if whatever he is doing is urgent then I should leave him to it. IEit’s important I’m sure he’ll tell me… right? With the kind of effort I am fairly sure most people reserve for running marathons or launching rockets into space, I drag myself out of the recliner and begin to make my way upstairs. I didn’t realise how tired I actually am but as soon as I stood up I realised. So I do as Bellamy suggested and get ready for bed. I kind of want to sleep, but I want to wait for him. Hopefully he doesn’t take too long. I collapse into bed and realise that while I was in the shower, my phone was going off. Ah, Harry. He did say I should keep an eye on the group chat.
COCK TALES
Harry- Okay, but GUYS. If this chat is for relationship drama then SOMEONE needs to include the update in Bellamy and Ryann’s progress. Ryann told Bellamy that she LOVES him! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! <3 <3 <3
Megan- I KNOW it’s so cute!
Ryann Guys… Is this really necessary?
Megan- Yes.
Harry- YES!
Darrien- Yep.
Amber- Of course.
Bellamy-… Uhm… You guys realise I told her that I love her too right?
Harry- Whatever dude.
Megan- Yeah, no big deal.
Darrien – We know Alpha.
Ryann- Why doesn’t he get a freak out for it?
Amber- I got this one babe. We all knew that he would say it given half a chance. Everyone has been waiting for you to catch up!
Ryann- Oh.
Megan- You telling Alpha Kohen about your relationship is a big deal too!
Darrien- Definitely. Good job Ryann! This belongs to NôvelDrama.Org: ©.
Amber- Congrats to you both. I mean this in a non- sarcastic way when I say I knew you would figure it out.
2/3
178- Managing and measuring
I am just now realising that all my friends are REALLY invested in my relationship with Bellamy. They know it’s like… inevitable right? Why are they all so excited? I’m more interested in hearing about Megan and Darrien, or Harry and Cam. Bellamy and I are already together. They still have to figure it out. My phone vibrates and again and I ch*ck it. It’s Aaron again. I find it hilarious how he reads
everything in the chat then messages me separately. I guess what few- words he does have to share aren’t intended for everyone.
Aaron–You did well today.
Ryann- Thanks Aaron.
The bedroom door swings open causing me to jump and half- launch my phone across the bed.
“Woah, jumpy.” Bellamy comments. He half runs to my side and drops to the bed in front of me.
“I have something for you. You don’t need to read it now. But when you’re ready, it’s for you. We talked earlier about things I’ve fantasised about. I wrote some of them out for you. None of these things have anything to do with work. I thought it might help serve as a reminder that this, our relationship. It is so much more than just us fulfilling a role.” Then before I can say a word he stands and heads into the ensuite. I stare at the folded piece of paper he dropped on the bed in front of me. I open it and immediately flush red at the first line.
I’ve wanted you in my bed since the first time I saw you.
I stop reading and fold it shut again. Nope, nope, nope. Definitely not able to read this right now. I tuck it away safely in the closet with some of my other keepsakes. I’ll… come back to it later.
Chapter Comments
DeliliaLayla
Noooo we wanna know!!!!
Visitor
so true
VIEW ALL 3 COMMENTS
15
POST COMMENT
10