Chapter 63 The Twins’ First Birthday
Grace’s P. O. V.
A Week Later
Tomorrow is the twins’ first birthday. We had planned a birthday trip to Steve’s private island with them, but now I can’t even cut the cake because Giana is still missing. We were so excited to celebrate their first birthday.
When will God stop testing my strength to endure pain? It’s becoming unbearable.
Olivia regained consciousness the next day after Giana was found missing. She recounted that someone wearing a black mask had made her unconscious before taking Giana. Every time I wonder who could kidnap my little princess, my breathing becomes heavy, thinking about that monster.
Tomorrow should be a day filled with joy and celebration, but it feels heavy without Giana around. I can’t focus on anything other than the empty crib where Giana should be. Every corner of our home holds memories of her laughter and smiles, reminding us of what we’ve lost.
I’m concerned for Evan as well. His once bright eyes are now dull with sadness, and he refuses to eat or play without his sister by his side. My heart breaks into a million pieces every time I see him standing by Giana’s empty crib, tears streaming down his cheeks as he calls out for her. Steve and I try our best to comfort him, but our efforts feel futile.
Steve suggests we should celebrate the twins’ birthday for Evan’s sake, insisting that Evan needs a change of atmosphere and a distraction from the pain. But the thought of celebrating without Giana feels like a betrayal, and I can’t bring myself to go through with it.
How can I enjoy a birthday when my daughter is missing? How can I smile and pretend that everything is okay when our hearts are shattered into pieces? And how can we celebrate when our family is torn apart? I can’t do this.
Trying to soothe Evan to sleep, I walk through the corridors. He is nestled in my arms, his tiny hand clutching my shirt. I pause outside Dad’s room, my steps faltering as I hear the muffled sobs emanating from inside.
As I peek inside, my heart shatters at the sight of Steve, his shoulders shaking with silent tears as he shares his pain with his father.
“Dad, I can’t bear it. I’ve already lost Giana, and with her, I feel like I’ve lost Grace too,” his voice trembles with pain. “The agony of Giana’s disappearance is unbearable, and seeing Grace suffer like this every day, it’s tearing me apart.”
Dad embraces him tightly, his eyes glistening with tears.
Fuck! What am I doing? I’m making Steve suffer more because of my agony. He’s trying so hard to be strong for both of us and here I am, drowning in my grief, not giving him the support he needs.
No. Now I won’t burden him anymore. I’ll stand strong for him and Evan. And I’ll do everything to bring back our daughter. I have faced the worst situations in my life and I have always emerged stronger. This time will be no different.
“Mama won’t let you and your daddy cry anymore because of her,” I murmur to Evan, stroking his hair.
***
When Steve returns to the room, I compose myself and approach him. “I’m ready.”
“Huh?” He gives me a confused look.
“To celebrate the birthday of the twins for Evan,” I tell him.NôvelDrama.Org content rights.
“Love.” He clasps my face. “It’s okay if you don’t want to. You don’t have to force yourself.”
“Steve, I want to do this for Evan.” I place my hand on his face, fixing my eyes on him. “Although we’re not in the right state of mind, we have to look after Evan. We need to cheer him up.”
“I’m glad you understand.” He kisses my forehead.
Only because I can’t see you suffering because of me more, Steve.
“It won’t be a big celebration. We’ll just get ready and cut the cake.” He tells me as we head towards the bed, hand in hand.
Despite my shattered heart and mind filled with negative thoughts, having Steve by my side brings some comfort. Every difficult phase of life becomes a little easier with him around.
***
The next day, as we prepare for the birthday celebration, I try to push aside my pain and focus on making it a special day for Evan. The room is adorned with the balloons and streamers. I haven’t stopped missing my princess for even a moment, pondering what she would be doing if she were here with us.
After getting ready, we take Evan to the hall where Steve’s friends (Jace and Mike) and Dad are waiting for us with the cake. Evan walks between us, keeping his legs wide, holding Steve and my hand. After a long time, he flashes a smile, seeing the decoration. Witnessing a smile on his tiny face, for a second, I smile, forgetting about my all worries.
I crouch down to his level and embrace him. “Happy birthday, Mama’s little boy.”
“Mama…” he rubs his face against my neck, causing me to chuckle.
Kissing his face, as I stand up, holding him in my arms. Steve pecks on his cheek.
“Dada…” Evan holds out his hand towards his father, and Steve takes him from my arms.
Steve walks towards the hall, entwining his free hand with mine. Mike and Jace wish Evan, “happy birthday,” before giving us sympathy looks.
As we gather around the cake, Evan bounces with excitement and claps his hands, his eyes sparkling with joy at the sight of the cake. Steve and I exchange a look of sadness, Giana’s absence killing us deep within.
After cutting the cake and sharing slices with everyone, we gather around Evan, showering him with gifts and love. Despite the pain, I plaster a smile on my face, wanting nothing more than to make this moment special for our little boy.
“I’ll be right back.” Steve suddenly rushes to the room, excusing himself, leaving me concerned for him.
I need to check on him.
“Dad, please take care of Evan. I need to use the washroom.” I request giving Evan to Dad.
“Sure. You go.” He gives me a nod, and I hurry to my room after kissing Evan’s hair.
As I enter the room, the sound of running water from the bathroom catches my attention, and my heart clenches with concern. I walk over to the bathroom and gently push open the door.
My heart sinks as I see Steve, sitting naked under the shower, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs. The sight of him in such a vulnerable state breaks my heart into a million pieces.
This was the last thing I wanted to witness. My shattered husband.
“Steve?” I whisper, my voice hardly audible over the rush of water. After approaching him, I gently place my hand on his shoulder, startling him.
He looks up at me, his eyes filled with tears and raw anguish, and without saying a word, I settle down beside him.
“Grace.” A loud sob escapes his mouth, shattering my soul. “I can’t… I can’t do this anymore. I can’t pretend to be fine when I’m not.”
My heart aches as I see the pain etched on his face, and I wrap my arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. “You don’t have to be strong all the time, Steve,” I murmur, pressing a kiss to his wet hair. “It’s okay to let it out, to feel the pain.”
Tears stream down my cheeks as he whimpers like a small baby in my arms, burying his face into my chest and clutching my dress. At that moment, all false displays of happiness falls away, and we’re just two broken souls clinging to each other in the darkness.
“I miss her, Grace,” Steve whispers. His voice can’t be heard properly over the sound of the water. “I miss her so much it hurts.”
“I know, Steve,” I whisper back, pulling him closer to me, my voice trembling with emotions. “I miss her too.”
“She has to come back for us, Grace. She has to…” his screams echo through the bathroom.
Closing my eyes, I press a kiss on his forehead after pulling him away from me. “We’ll find her, Steve,” I murmur, my words a solemn vow. “We’ll bring her back home, safe and sound. I promise.”
He cries, again digging his face into my chest. “I can’t live without her. Every second feels like a burden.”
We stay like that for what feels like an eternity, the water from the shower washing away our tears as we hold each other firmly, trying to find solace.
***
At night, after putting Evan to sleep. Steve and I lie down, cuddling each other and staring at Giana’s last photo, which I had clicked in the garden before she found missing. She sits in the stroller and smiles with joy, reaching up to high-five me. With her wrist adorned by a bracelet engraved with the initial letter of her name, she looks fabulous in her white and pink striped outfit.
“Steve, I just wish I could turn back time and change everything.” As I murmur, my voice is laced with regret, and tears brimmed in my eyes. I feel so guilty for leaving the twins with the nanny that day. Because of my one mistake, I lost Giana.
“Love, please don’t blame yourself,” he explains, grabbing my chin to make me look at him. “It’s not your fault. We couldn’t have predicted what would happen.”
As I bury my face in his chest, he wraps his warm arms around me. “Giana will be back in our arms, Grace. Just stay strong.” He caresses my hair to comfort me.