Just shut up
Hardin
Guilt and frustration were the exact words to describe how I felt every time that I made Jasmine break out in tears. I was toxic, and I did not need to be told.
I was gradually becoming the image of me that my mother would not like and anytime I thought about how she felt watching what I suddenly turned out to become, I cursed severally.
From where I stood at the balcony, I watched Jasmine leave the party with Nadia tagging behind her confusedly. I only realized that I had been staring at her for so long, when the twins came behind me, calling me out of my thoughts.
“Weird right? We also feel that way, I mean the way you pay special attention to her. Is there something we do not know?” Sandro pointed out, and I furrowed my brows like I had no idea what he was talking of.
“Who?”
“Your step sister, man. I don’t think we can hold back from saying it,” Alex joined.
“Ohhh… Jasmine. My father suddenly added a responsibility on me by making me her personal body guard which is frustrating as hell, as she never stays at a place. So I’m just wondering if she’s safe as she’s leaving the party at this hour,” I mentioned, taking a sip from the cup of cognac I had in my hands.
One thing that I was not the best at doing especially when it came to the twins was lying as they most times saw through my lies, so I tried my best to keep my calm with the Brandy in my hands as a corner of my eyes watched the car Jasmine had gotten into, zoom off.
“I think I should leave now. The party’s not as lit as I expected,” gulping down the last content of the Brandy, I informed, and made to leave when Alex suddenly came up with his teasy talk of how I had enjoyed myself with Astrid.
With a glare, I made him keep quiet before walking away.
I had barely left the balcony when Astrid and the other girl, of which I knew little of her name, walked up to me, trying to be touchy.
“You are going already? Can’t you just stay a little longer?” Astrid asked, and why she was talking, the blonde haired girl had already come closer to me and was trying to rub her butts in front of me.
“Stay off me,” I muttered within my breath but she did not listen. With the anger inside of me, I pushed her to the floor, causing Astrid to shake in trepidation.
“Now what did she do?” She questioned, the hatred everyone always used to stare at me, evident in her eyes. Or maybe my brain was just overthinking but I had gotten used to that same stare from every other person that I began to care less about what they felt.
“I think you are already forgetting that whatever happened between the three of us was a one time thing, and should not be heard of in a public space. Neither will I condone any display of unnecessary affection. Do you hear me?” Without expecting any reply from them, I walked straight to my car, with my teeth gritted in annoyance about how I had to fake pleasure with them.
I did not enjoy any bit of the sex, and I only realized how foolish I was after getting into the car and had watched the video that I forced Jasmine to see. I deleted it immediately in disgust, as if there was any sex video that I wanted to watch, then it was the one with Jasmine but I could not make any video of her during sex, as a large part of me felt that I needed Jasmine’s permission..
Arriving at home, the first place I walked to was Jasmine’s room as the guilt from what I had done at the party still clouded my mind. Luckily, I had a key that gave access to her room. Jasmine was curled up in a fetal position, with fear visible in her face as she slept. I had no idea how much trauma that she experienced before finally putting herself to sleep.
But I could remember vividly how she sounded when she asked, “why did you have to show me this?”
Unable to control the guilt within me, I left to my room and only realized that I had managed to sleep when morning came, with Lisa’s knock on my door.
“I came to call you for breakfast?” She had a wide grin as she said it, and as I was about to shake my head in refusal, she spoke.
“You don’t have an option actually, your dad asked that I call you for breakfast. Thanks to Camila who blabbed about how you have been missing from breakfast for a while.”
I could see Lisa’s intent in her speech, as it was clear that all she wanted was to stir up hatred in my heart towards Camila. But my mind was rather busy that morning to pay any attention towards her, so I nodded and shut the door behind me, so I could freshen up and join them at breakfast.NôvelDrama.Org copyrighted © content.
Jasmine’s face was fixed on her food as I walked into the dinning room, I guessed she was trying to not maintain any contact with me, which was really fine with me. As much as the guilt still ate me up, I was glad I had reminded her of her place and maybe whenever she tried flirting with Lorenzo, then it will ring to her head that he just wanted to enjoy the moment with her and had no real feelings for her. Not like I cared though.
“You have not been coming downstairs for breakfast. Is everything okay?” Dad asked me immediately I sat down, causing me to drop the fork that I had already picked up.
“I am fine. When did you suddenly begin to check on me?” My request had startled Dad but I saw how he tried to keep his cool. I could not hold back from saying my mind, as all of his actions felt like a pretense. Ever since mom’s death, he never really showed any care for me and it only got worse when I refused to accept his marriage with Camila.
Chuckling in a way that felt awkward to me, “I have always cared about you. It’s fine if you never noticed it,” he replied.
“Well, I don’t know. Just do your thing,” I shrugged and though I knew that my reply was rather rude as I felt Dad’s glare on me, my attention remained on my food. Breakfast continued silently with the only sounds heard, being that of the cutleries. Well, until Lisa voiced out everything she wanted to say, I noticed she had something fishy up her sleeves with the smirk that danced on her lips when she called me for breakfast.
“Nadia said something about parties yesterday. Jasmine, your friend Nadia, am I right?”
Her question called every body’s attention towards her, and that was the first time since I joined breakfast that morning that I noticed Jasmine raising her head.
“Yes,” she said, her eyes searching Lisa’s like she was trying to read whatever was underneath her question.
“Oh! That’s good. I am guessing you had a good time at the party.”
“Sure,” Jasmine replied and took her eyes back down, but Lisa did not stop there.
She had not only piqued the interest of everyone at the table, but had also caused Jasmine’s heart to beat faster than usual. I could hear the sound of it, as I also struggled to keep my breathing steady. Russo will have surely noticed that something was off, if my heart pace increased also.
“You had a good time? But you did not look like you did when you rushed into the house with tears in your eyes. And isn’t that the same party Hardin went to? Why did he not bring you back?”
Jasmine had absolutely nothing to say, as she tried muttering incoherent words. I watched her closely, trying to predict her next display of foolishness, as she could not be wise enough to at least hide her emotions last night.
“Is it true dear? Tell me, what happened yesterday?” Camila probed, and the fear in Jasmine’s face increased. Lisa did not stop, as she continued pushing to get an answer, and it took every endurance within me to not tell at her to just keep quiet.
“Jasmine dear…” Camila was about to start with her motherly care, a constant reminder to me that I no longer had a mother before Dad interrupted.
“Enough of the pressures, and you should stop it with the questions, Lisa. I think she is just going through one of those times as a teenager. You know, your crush doing things that you don’t like and the rest. She will be fine, maybe you should try talking to her later.” Russo said, with his statement accompanied by a light chuckle.
Surprise was the exact reaction I had to his statement as I looked straight at him. It was sad and amusing at the same time, to know that Russo understood everything about pressures and the “times a teenager had to go through” but it was always different with me.
Did he even care if I had times?
Did he notice that it was too much pressure whenever he talked down on everything I do and never for once appreciated me?
Lisa was right. Jasmine had suddenly taken every place in Russo’s mind. He was now making excuses for her. Something he never did, even when I made the slightest mistake growing up. And he did not make the anger that I felt any better, when he decided to throw his next question at me.
“Speaking about Jasmine coming back alone, did I not entrust Jasmine’s care to you, Hardin?” I did not answer as I tried my best to not flare up, and continued eating.
“Am I not talking to you Hardin? It was just a simple task. Always be with your sister, so simple! Still you can’t do it. Is there anything you are good enough for?”
“Umm… Dad is not Hardin’s fault. Actually he…”
“Just shut up!” I bawled out at Jasmine, unable to control my anger.
“Jasmine this, Jasmine that, Jasmine… It’s always Jasmine. Don’t I have my own pressures? Don’t I have my times that I go through?”
“What are you saying? Jasmine is your sister, and the pressure is all because you are going to be an Alpha.”
“She is not my sister, don’t entrust her care to me.” I stood up in annoyance, about to leave the dinning room before I paused and turned back, “it’s too much of how I am going to be an Alpha. I just want to live a life right now,” I said, then walked out of the room.
Camila and Jasmine had shivered at my outburst, while Lisa had this satisfied smile on her lips. I had no idea of the consequences of my actions, but I just wanted to find my peace.
And I got into my car and drove out of the mansion to no where in particular as I was not ready to listen to any talk from Lisa, or even Camila.